Dear Scrote

[andygates]

For nicking my trusty Lumicycle lights, which you do not know the value of and which are useless to you without the charger, which at best you'll get a tenner for to fund your wretched crack habit, for generally being an arse of the lowest order -

- I wish you self-knowledge in spades.  And if that doesn't work out for you, just let me find you.  Let me find your babies.  Let me into your home so I can nail the doors shut and zip-tie the ones you love and execute every motherfucking last one of them and skull-fuck the bullet-holes in their flat fetal-alcohol-syndrome faces and make you watch and then put the whole fucking episode up on YouTube.

I am vexed.  You better not be seen riding around town with those lights on.