Dear chav fuckhead

[andygates]

You do not, ever, shunt people with your pimped-out Astra. If you do, you may discover that the spotty nerdy cyclist is some hulking great very very angry horror with a stupid moustache.

I'm very impressed that I didn't go beyond throwing his keys in the traffic: for some reason I really, really wanted to go at all three of them. Ho hum, at least they did me the favour of driving with their windows down. Spring may bring the fuckheads out, ,but it makes them easy targets.

Comments

[flitljm.livejournal.com]

I'm very impressed that you did have the presence of mind to throw his keys into traffic.

It reminds me of Michael yanking open the car door of a driver who had pulled up onto a zebra crossing, in order to even the power balance or something. In this instance he realised that he'd scared her, and ended up feeling guilty (car drivers can feel quite vulnerable with their seatbelts still on). But I bet she respected other road users more afterwards.

[andygates.livejournal.com]

Well, I've got previous with a mobile phone... but it's a traditional response and the keys are near the window precisely so that it can be done. By, er, Police or something.

As for intimidation: Frankly, good. If they won't play nice, then they SHOULD be afraid. I want them to give nervous room to every cyclist in case they turn out to be a psycho. I want them to get used to being one rung down on the fucking food chain.

(ahem)

No, this is not nice, or considerate, or progressive, and Ghandi would be turning wearily in his grave. But being nice doesn't work: you simply cannot correct or remonstrate with any driver, they are all small gods in their small boxes. And that leaves being nasty or being a doormat.

[ravenbait.livejournal.com]

Omnia vincit amor, baby.

Or so I'm told.

Mind you, I'm the one who bought the fortress gloves, so I'm sure you can guess what I think about that particular meme.

[andygates.livejournal.com]

Omnia vincit vis, more like. Apologies for the declension. Must finish those chainmail gloves.

Omnia vincit amor my arse. I refer the honourable aldy - as she damnwell knows - to her favoured quote about pacifism. You could, without doubt, conquer the entire planet armed only with a butter knife.

[andygates.livejournal.com]

And those Fortress gloves are sooooo cool :)

[thudthwacker.livejournal.com]

Hops over to Google.

Hey, neat. Izzat sintered armorgel?

[thudthwacker.livejournal.com]

And, speaking of sintered armorgel, check this out.

[ravenbait.livejournal.com]

Oooooh.

Me want.

No, the Fortress Gloves have kevlar.

They are quite fine. Specialized actually make gloves that fit my dinky little not-properly-opposable mutant hands.

[andygates.livejournal.com]

"Feels like gritty jell-O, protects like a stack of telephone books" eh, thud?

See, now THAT is a superhero suit. Beats bloody lycra. My tastes run a little more medieval and homebrew: http://www.ravenfamily.org/andyg/images/mailglove.jpg

[thudthwacker.livejournal.com]

"Feels like gritty jell-O, protects like a stack of telephone books" eh, thud?

Let's just say that, if I ever come into a truly obscene amount of money, Snowcrash is on the short-list of novels I'd consider making a miniseries out of. Along with Guards!, Guards! and ... I don't even know what else. A very short list, then.

My tastes run a little more medieval and homebrew:

Very nice work. Protection, style, and also good for dropping chav fuckheads if necessary.

[thudthwacker.livejournal.com]

No, the Fortress Gloves have kevlar.

That's what I figured, honestly, since I got sintered armorgel out of Snowcrash. I was really surprised to see that someone had actually made the rough equivalent of the stuff, though. I mean, this kind of material has been a mainstay in scifi for years, and I was vaguely aware that there were materials with strain rate flexibility (which is presumably the cause of its appearance in scifi), but I this is the first I've heard of a practical application in body armor.

[ravenbait.livejournal.com]

For lo, I am a Hawk amongst pigeons.

Bring it on, baby.

[andygates.livejournal.com]

They need reminding that they're not the alpha predators. We are.

They're the beta herbivores, medium-sized herd animals. The alphas, the big bulls, are trucks and buses - but regular car drivers? They're just cattle. The kind of dinosaurs no schoolchild ever wanted to be. Psittacosaurs. Edmontosaurs.

We're the mammals, baby.

Well, apart from some hawks.

[thudthwacker.livejournal.com]

Omnia vincit amor

Until Sam's rant, I'd been misreading this as "omnia vincit armor", especially when the Kevlar uber-gloves showed up in context.

I think I like the "armor" version better than the other one. Very OGRE.

[flitljm.livejournal.com]

Oo, pretty!

[flitljm.livejournal.com]

Um, the Fortress gloves, not the tongue piercing. Though its very you, darling.