andygates

A revelation has come unto me.  I've worked out why I can't stand Tobey Maguire's Spider-Man.

It's not that he's a whiney emo boi-bitch.  Spidey's a whiney teen.  That's fine.  It's not that he speaks in expository voice-over, because Spidey does that too.  It's not even that Sam Raimi gets flabbier and less entertaining the more money he has to work with, or that Spidey's beloved wise-cracking has been drowned under those big watery baby blues.

It's simply this:  Tobey Maguire looks like a young Harry Enfield.

'Nuff said.